Everything's better with Facon (and broken glass), right?

Why I shouldn't attempt to make tea 4 seconds after getting up....

My throat's been sore lately (perfectly good vacation day WASTED because it could have been a sick day....that's another gripe for another time), so I wanted to make some tea for it. I got the water ready, got the teabag in the cup, then thought I should add some honey. I open the cabinet where I keep honey (along with other miscellaneous spices/oils/random things used for cooking), and put my hand on what looks like the honey container. I almost have the cap off when I realize that it's NOT honey, it's vanilla extract. So I put it back and try again. The second time, I'm WAY convinced that I have the honey, but it turned out to be imitation bacon bits. Which I'm REALLY glad I noticed before they got in my cup. Though, I suppose as long as the water wasn't in there I could have poured them back in......The third time I managed to find the honey and successfully got it in my cup.

BUT THEN! Just now, when I went to put the water in my tea, I opened the cabinet to get something to cover my teacup (following package directions for once) and managed to knock a glass out of the cabinet which proceeded to bounce off the counter and explode into billions of tiny shards all over the counter, and the floor, (but fortunately NOT my teacup....I don't think. Haven't tried drinking it yet.)

Maybe the moral of this story is not, "don't do things in the morning". Maybe it's, "Sari, put your glasses on, duh!" But I think it's a little bit "don't do things in the morning".

This is an ACTUAL Water Fountain

It's also what just happened in my kitchen.

I had purchased a bottle of generic brand fizzy flavored water to try to take me back to the glory days of my freshman year of college and the Clearly Canadian water* that was at least 70% responsible for me making it through. (And 95% responsible for one of my favorite stories ever*****) I should point out here that the water had been comfortably sitting in it's bottle on the floor where we keep everything else we have to drink** for about 3 hours. I then picked it up, moved it to the counter, and left it there for about 5 minutes while I put ice in a cup****. Finally, I twisted open the cap, expecting a bit of a fizz up but nothing too dramatic. Boy was I wrong. It fizzed. A lot. I saw this happening and tried to lift it so that it fizzed into the sink........incorrect decision. As I lifted it, the water shot out the side of the cap at me, the refrigerator, and the section of carpet about 3 feet away. So now the kitchen AND me are sticky. Fan-freaking-tastic.

*If ANYONE can tell me where I can still buy this stuff in the US as per the implications on that website I'll immediately grant you any one wish that is within my ever reaching powers to grant.

**Against my will, I should add. I do my darnedest to clean the corner of the dining room up, but somehow stuff just keeps magically re-piling there after every trip to the store.***

***It IS possibly more than definitely my fault that we buy our beer by the case and have nowhere else to put it.

****Shutup, the sink was full of dishes from dinner and I had a hard time refilling the tray since I'm ridiculously OCD about all the trays being filled to the same height.

*****One night my freshman year, Haru and I had taken a walk to get either a movie or a video game or SOMETHING like that from the video place. While we were out, we stopped and bought some Clearly Canadian waters (because they were life sustaining) and Haru had some sort of sour liquid candy thingy that they sold at the video place. We went back to the dorm and were in Haru's room watching said video (or I was watching said video game being played....the specifics aren't important.) Haru was sitting on his roommate's bed since Haru had the top bunk. His roommate happened to be out with some folk because it was his birthday. Haru got the brilliant idea that he should take a drink of the sour candy then take a drink of the fizzy water and see what happened. What happened was that the water fizzed all over his lap AND his roommate's bed. So Haru, being the nice, quiet, resourceful guy that he is, went and put new sheets on the bed. Just as he was finishing up, his roommate came home. Haru just turned around, looked at him, and said, "Happy Birthday, Rock. I changed your sheets." Rock's reply: "Thanks." *long pause. Look over to me sitting in the chair.* "Hey! Wait, why?!" True story.